** spoiler alert **

A story about:
The heroine.
The hero and his ex girlfriend and their baby.

It’s told from her POV only, yet when they’re together, I can often FEEL the heartfelt caring the hero has for the heroine. The dialogue is natural and real and the story flows nicely. Of all the many different sources of angst in this book, these are the ones that stand out for me:

Readers will love this hero:
Ryan is sweet, gentle and caring and a decent man.
He loves the heroine, Alani, more than he has ever loved anyone:
Ryan: “The couple of hours I had with you there meant more to me than the past two years with her (the ow).””

The heroine:
Alani is vulnerable and loving and giving, loyal and sweetly misguided but she loves the hero with all her heart. She leaves her family and friends and moves from Brooklyn NY to be with him in North Dakota.

The other woman is Ryan’s pregnant ex:
Ryan: Stephanie “was my best friend all throughout school.””
Ryan: ““Stephanie and I were dating for about two years before I met you.””

The plots:
The 1st 3 paragraphs of the blurb about sums up the 1st part of the book. The 2nd part of the book is where it starts to get more….complicated. In the mix there are many goings on, lots of drama and tears, friendships and jealousies, happiness and sadness, etc. I was drawn to all the twists and turns the story had to offer, especially when Stephanie tells Alani that she is pregnant with Ryan’s child. Yeah, he keeps this news from Alani, unfortunately.

Ryan is a standup guy:
One of a kind.
He does what he believes is the right thing and commits to both these women –
He has them both move in with him:
Alani is the love of his life and he is possessive of her, he wants her in his life. He NEEDS her. Desperately so. So they live together and make a life together.
Stephanie is 4 weeks pregnant with his son and in Ryan’s words “”…..(Stephanie) and her mother lost their jobs at Ray’s Body shop and they’re both homeless. Her mother is moving in with a friend and I offered Stephanie a room here with us until she is back on her feet.”
So they live together too. All 3 of them. Under one roof.


Naturally things are strained:
Alani:
“You told her she could move in with us?”
Ryan:
“Well it made no sense for me to pay for a place for her when we have all this room.”


**Shudder**


Ryan:
“…nothing will change between us, it’s only temporary. A couple of weeks until she is back on her feet again. I promise, I only want you.”



Stephanie: (the other woman)
• Stephanie: “You know the second this baby comes out he’s going to leave you.” Her voice was low so only I could hear.
• “she asked him for a foot rub”
• “Anytime we were in the kitchen or trying to snuggle up on the couch,she found a reason to bring up memories that were inappropriate or insisted on siting really close to Ryan.”


Alani: (the heroine)
• “Ryan suggested that the best room for her was the guest room, also known as my office and I didn’t argue.”
• “Sex between us was becoming less frequent. It had been three weeks since Stephanie moved in and we had only had sex three times.”
• Alani: “I’m tired of you not wanting to kiss me or hold me unless it’s in our bedroom……”


Ryan and Alani:
His body went cold, numb against mine before he pulled away and looked down at me. “I’m sorry, I can’t.” He said, his head low shaking from side to side. “You can’t or you don’t want to Ryan? Because of her.”


This entire scene is one I can honestly say I have never seen in any other book before:
Ryan: “Can I take you to dinner and a movie tomorrow night. I know I have been a really crappy boyfriend lately.”………..
“Perfect, it’s a date.”

“……..he was forty minutes late. Clearly something has happened…….. I tried his cell again, still no response…….”
“…….Michael (Ryan’s bff) spoke. “He went to go find out the sex of the baby.”

Ryan: “………I’m having a little boy.”……………….. He knelt in front of her (Stephanie, the other woman) placing both hands on her stomach. Speaking directly into her belly. “Hey there my little man. I’m your daddy.” A tear slid down Ryan’s face and Stephanie looked down at him, wiping it away while smiling at him……”

“He looked deep into my (the heroine) eyes searching for any reason why my face showed anger. His face changed when he finally realized what was bothering me…….”
Ryan: “Please forgive me.” He wrapped his hands around me and I inhaled his scent one last time”
Ryan: “I have to run into the office for a bit, can we discuss this when I get back?”



Sigh………



Alani eventually leaves him in August.

“Ryan calls you at least once a day but you refuse to talk to him”

“If he really wanted to fight for me, he would have flown out here.”

This is where other plot devices come in, all on her side of the country.

Then, she reads a message:
“It has been 73 days since you walked out of my life. Not a day has gone by that I don't miss you. This will be the last time you hear from me. I hope your world is filled with love, laughter, and happiness. I’m deeply sorry for any pain I have caused you. Happy Birthday, Alani, I will love you with all my heart, always and forever.
Ryan”



Sigh………….



Mid November she flies back to him:

“……..there’s been an accident. It’s bad, he really needs you……..”

““I’m on my way.” I said”



Sigh…………


Ryan is fine. Unharmed.
But:
“……(The baby) is only five weeks premature….he is breathing on his own so that is a good sign……..(Stephanie)…unfortunately didn’t make it…..”

“I rubbed my hand up and down his back as he cried into my shoulder.….”



So she stays:
“…you won’t have to do this alone, you have your family….” I assured (Ryan)...”
“And you?” He questioned, his eyes focused on mine.
“Yes and me, I’ll help you as much as I can……”


Back at his house he tells her that when she left him, Stephanie had moved out. This is the 1st she hears of it:
Ryan:“….I insisted she find a place the exact day you were left.”


And she apologises for leaving him, not taking his calls….
Alani: “I’m sorry. I assumed.” I told him……..
Ryan: “It's ok. If you would had answered at least one of my calls then maybe you would have known.” He digged.

Sigh………………


The funeral:
“Stephanie, gave me the greatest gift possible right before she passed. Our son…..will never get to meet his mother, but I’ll make sure that he will never go without knowing the person she was…”
(Ryan) explained that life was too short to let anger surround us, that at a moment’s notice our loved ones could be taken from us…”


I wish:
• That he thought this way before he let Alani walk away from him.
• That he needed to be with Alani enough to follow her before Stephanie died and left him alone with Stephen.
• That Alani was stronger and that she didn’t settle
• That he SHOWED her how much he loved her instead of merely TELLING her.
• That he didn’t feel the need for Stephanie to move in with them
• That it was him coming to her that brought them together and not the death of his ex and the birth of his son that enabled this joining.


Then I thought we were moving one step forward when Ryan finally admits his mistake:
“I’m sorry. I should have fought for you. I shouldn’t have given up on you. On us.” He apologized.”


Aaaand I feel we’re moving two steps back:
Ryan: “….for the last few months I have tried to wrap my brain
around why you chose to leave, why you never answered one text or call…..”


Aaaand some more steps back when she begs him to forgive her for sleeping with her ex (albeit reluctantly) while she and Ryan were apart. “…Please, Ryan, please forgive me…”


THEN Ryan shows he’s de man afterall:
“…I hate that you were with him but I wasn’t in your life. I didn’t fight hard enough for you. I know I was wrong, I should have never let Stephanie move in here. I needed to put you first. I should have kissed you and made love to you every hour possible. I fucked that up, I know…”


But I wanted Alani to hear those words from him sooner.
Before she’s needed to look after his motherless baby boy. Cos this is what she does now. To the exclusion of everyone and anything else.


Until March, the next year, when she realises what her life has become:
Alani: “I completely forgot about your (her bestie) birthday”

Bestie: ““You are so fucking busy raising a baby that, one, isn't yours.
You do realize that, Alani, you didn’t give birth to him. You are his stand in mother. And Two, Ryan never asked you to stay and raise him.”


The penny drops and she leaves again. And he lets her. No mess. No fuss.
He DOES follow her though.
Engaged.
Married.
Pregnant.
Ryan is away, of course, the day she goes into labour. He misses about 8 hours of her pain.

Alani calls Ryan:
“I didn’t want to call him but I had no choice. “Hi, I’m so sorry to bother you, but its time.”

Sigh….


But he DOES get there before the birth. To a cute baby girl who looks “much the opposite of her brother.”


The brother (hero and ow's son:) :

• Who has Stephanie’s light features
• Whom Ryan has named: “Stephen, after his mother.”
• For whom “there were pictures around the house of her so he would never forget her.”


Sigh……









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I received an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

“You see what the problem is though, is that I want to be your last first kiss. I want to make sure that the first kiss we share is mesmerizing, that you never want to kiss another person after me.”

Are you in the market for a sweet love story with a touch of angst and a dash of what the hell?! Have I ever got the book for you! Divided starts with an immediate connection between two souls, a longing for something more, a deeper connection. Drama ensues, heartbreak endures, and life goes on. You are GOING to fall in love, you are GOING to want to scream, but most of all you’ll enjoy a good story.

“I don’t want someone to sweep me off my feet if he isn’t going to be there to catch me when I fall.”

Alani is in Las Vegas for her bachelorette party when she randomly meets Ryan. Though she is engaged and doesn’t act on it, the electricity between the two of them is glaringly apparent. However, she is engaged, and he lives half way across the country in the middle of nowhere. With reservations and a hopeful heart, they part ways. Alani returns home and due to events you will discover, calls off her wedding. Needing to clear her head and get away from everything, she decides to head to Ryan’s town in North Dakota. Not necessarily for him, but to find peace.

“I let you walk out of my life before. I won’t let you walk away from me again.”

The book moved a little slow for me at parts, but overall I enjoyed it. I LOVED the scenes between Alani and Ryan and the loved that they grew to share. When you know, you know, and though they tried to deny it, you cannot fight the inevitable. If you are meant to be together, no matter the circumstances, the universe will find a way to make it happen. 4 star read for me!

“You are my strength, my reason, my air to breathe. I love you so much.”







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