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Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As…
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Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It (English Edition) (edició 2016)

de Chris Voss (Autor), Tahl Raz (Autor)

MembresRessenyesPopularitatValoració mitjanaMencions
1,973298,393 (4.25)6
Business. Self-Improvement. Nonfiction. HTML:

A former international hostage negotiator for the FBI offers a new, field-tested approach to high-stakes negotiations??whether in the boardroom or at home.

After a stint policing the rough streets of Kansas City, Missouri, Chris Voss joined the FBI, where his career as a hostage negotiator brought him face-to-face with a range of criminals, including bank robbers and terrorists. Reaching the pinnacle of his profession, he became the FBI's lead international kidnapping negotiator. Never Split the Difference takes you inside the world of high-stakes negotiations and into Voss's head, revealing the skills that helped him and his colleagues succeed where it mattered most: saving lives. In this practical guide, he shares the nine effective principles??counterintuitive tactics and strategies??you too can use to become more persuasive in both your professional and personal life.

Life is a series of negotiations you should be prepared for: buying a car, negotiating a salary, buying a home, renegotiating rent, deliberating with your partner. Taking emotional intelligence and intuition to the next level, Never Split the Difference gives you the competitive edge in any discuss… (més)

Membre:bhorton
Títol:Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It (English Edition)
Autors:Chris Voss (Autor)
Altres autors:Tahl Raz (Autor)
Informació:Harper Business (2016), Edition: 1, 285 pages
Col·leccions:Have Read
Valoració:****
Etiquetes:Cap

Informació de l'obra

Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended on It de Chris Voss

  1. 00
    Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement without Giving In de Roger Fisher (supersidvicious)
    supersidvicious: Whilst the work of Fisher, Ury and Patton is the reference for collaborative decision making, Voss goes beyond win-win goal to explain how to sketch out negotiations to win all making at the same time your counterpart satisfied using emotional intelligence.… (més)
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» Mira també 6 mencions

Es mostren 1-5 de 29 (següent | mostra-les totes)
Overall it’s loaded with good stuff. It’s readable and moves along pretty well. Thankfully much better than those airport bookstore bullshit business books.

There is a little repetition of some topics though in the end I am okay with that because some of the skills are not so easy to assimilate.

All of the anecdotes show the techniques succeeding. I would like to hear more about how to adapt when they fail. Maybe he just switches to a different technique. ( )
  fotmasta | May 23, 2024 |
Ladies and gentlemen, I am a fool for reading this book and thinking that it would help make me a better negotiator. Furthermore, I believe that many of the positive reviews of this book are from people who enjoyed reading it and believe that they must be better negotiators because they've worked to internalize its lessons, but who have never actually tried to put them into practice.

Voss is an exciting writer and you believe his stories, even though they are almost without exception stories of his incredible triumphs. It may not strike you, though, as it didn't strike me, that he rarely tells a story of failing a negotiation and learning from the failure. Take one of the few examples in the book that isn't from a crime scene. He saw the truck of his dreams. The dealer was asking $36,000 for it. (We gather that this was some years ago.) Voss goes into the dealership and sits there saying "no" to every dealer offer until he gets the price he wants: $30,000, or over 16% off the asking price.

It's an impressive story, until you stop to think about how lucky Voss was. After all, the dealership was clearly at least as motivated to sell the truck to him as he was to buy the truck. What if they had been more confident that they could sell the truck to someone else at the price they were asking? After all, the truck was a unique piece — that's why Voss wanted it so badly. And what if the dealer's cost for the truck was well above Voss's $30,000 figure, and they were not willing to sell at a loss? Voss's book doesn't deal with these scenarios. His stories rarely involve insurmountable roadblocks or necessary compromises. They're all about Voss, the best negotiator in the world, getting what he wants from a transaction. But we, his readers, are not as talented as Voss. We need not just to be fired up with stories of triumph, but to learn from difficult situations.

You guessed it: I went into a car dealership with Voss's book under my belt and tried to deal. It went wrong every which way. First, the dealership wouldn't come down on price — at all. And why should they? I was trying to buy a particular model in low supply and high demand. Second, when the dealership determined that I was trying to get a deal, they switched me from the initial salesperson, whom I liked, to another with a different attitude. The friendliness level dropped quickly, and that threw me. The simple fact was that I wanted to buy the car from them much more than they wanted to sell the car to me (in particular). And I'd missed one of Voss's implied lessons — one that he doesn't spell out, because it arises naturally from his personality: never lose your cool. Stay smiling. I wasn't prepared for the roadblocks I encountered, and when I lost my cool the game was over.

Eventually, I put a deposit down on the car. At full price. Weeks later, I'm still stinging.

I think that if you are more like me than like Voss — that is, if you sometimes experience social anxiety in difficult situations, if you are often unsure of yourself, if you tend to be trusting until you suddenly are not, or if you are more of an introvert than an extravert — you will get yourself into trouble by learning Voss's tips, because the greater lessons are ones that he never thinks to spell out.

On the other hand, if you, like Voss, are extraverted, easy-going, like to tussle a bit, then maybe this book will help you better play a game you probably already play pretty well.

Buyer beware. ( )
  john.cooper | Jan 28, 2024 |
This was an intriguing read, but it fell short for me. The book shines when Voss delves into thrilling, adrenaline-pumping anecdotes from his FBI days, whether it's negotiating with terrorists in harsh jungle environments or defusing intense bank robber hostage situations. These stories held my attention, and if the book were entirely made up of such captivating tales, it would have been a home run!

When the subject matter shifts from high-stakes hostage situations to corporate boardroom negotiations, the narrative loses some of its appeal. While I understand that it was important for Voss to cover a variety of negotiation scenarios, the abrupt shift from life-or-death situations to business deals felt jarring and caused any lingering intrigue to vanish. I would have preferred it if Voss had provided more relatable scenarios for the average reader.

The text's constant repetition is another area where the book could have been improved. The same ideas are repeated throughout, but using different anecdotes. If the author had taken these opportunities to elaborate on different aspects of his negotiation techniques or share more varied experiences, the reader would have gained more value.

I had mixed feelings about the negotiation techniques themselves. The book introduces some intriguing concepts, such as the value of tactical empathy and the use of calibrated questions. However, I began to doubt whether these methods had the transformative power Voss touted. It would have been more convincing if the author had gone into greater detail about why these techniques work, perhaps by grounding them in psychological or sociological theories.

The book appears to oversell its techniques, making it difficult to accept every success story at face value. It's all too convenient: every friend or student who tried Voss' methods appears to have struck gold. A more balanced portrayal of successes and failures, or an acknowledgement that negotiation outcomes are also influenced by factors outside of one's control, would have enhanced the book's credibility.

Despite its flaws, "Never Split the Difference" has its moments. Voss's high-stakes negotiation stories are entertaining to read, and there are some valuable takeaways. In our increasingly disconnected world, the emphasis on empathy in negotiation, for example, is a much-needed reminder.

In short, this is an okay read, but don't expect it to provide the holy grail of negotiation strategies. ( )
  Elizabeth_Cooper | Oct 27, 2023 |
Book title and author: Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss. Reviewed 9/24/23

Why I picked this book up: after winning the Workbook for Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It by Chris Voss back in July or August 2023 I really wanted to read the actual book so bought this one and am happy I did.

Thoughts: This author did life and death negotiations while mine are nothing close to that but he did cover things that were up my alley as a psychologist. He correctly pointed out “Listening is not a passive activity. It is the most active thing you can do.” People want to be understood and accepted. Listening is the cheapest, yet most effective concession we can make to get there. By listening intensely, a negotiator demonstrates empathy and shows a sincere desire to better understand what the other side is experiencing. It begins with listening, making it about the other people, validating their emotions, and creating enough trust and safety for a real conversation to begin. This book did a splendid job teaching the importance of navigating crucial conversations with impact. With the right techniques, we can find win-win situations. Active Listening, Asking Open Questions, Showing Empathy, and Summarizing. He shows The importance to embrace regular, thoughtful conflict as the basis of effective negotiation—and of life. Listening. Listening is not a passive activity. It is the most active thing you can do. It begins with listening, making it about the other people, validating their emotions, and creating enough trust and safety for a real conversation to begin.

Good negotiators are ready for surprises; great negotiators aim to use their skills to reveal the surprises they are certain exist. The goal is to identify what your counterparts actually need (monetarily, emotionally, or otherwise) and get them feeling safe enough to talk and talk and talk some more about what they want. The latter will help you discover the former.

Behavioral Change Stairway Model (BCSM). The model proposes five stages—active listening, empathy, rapport, influence, and behavioral change—that take any negotiator from listening to influencing behavior.

Creating unconditional positive regard opens the door to changing thoughts and behaviors. Humans have an innate urge toward socially constructive behavior. The more a person feels understood, and positively affirmed in that understanding, the more likely that urge for constructive behavior will take hold.

Create a Subtle Epiphany
The sweetest two words in any negotiation are actually “That’s right.”

You don’t want to hear “You’re right.”

This indicates they see the solution as yours, not theirs.

Negotiation is about finding irrational blind spots, hidden needs, and undeveloped notions.

Don’t Compromise

Deadlines are often arbitrary, almost always flexible, and hardly ever trigger the consequences we think—or are told—they will.

As a negotiator, you should always be aware of which side, at any given moment, feels they have the most to lose if negotiations collapse.

People trust those who are in their in-group. Belonging is a primal instinct. And if you can trigger that instinct, that sense that, “Oh, we see the world the same way,” then you immediately gain influence.

Bottom line: People who expect more (and articulate it) get more.

Embrace Conflict
People generally fear conflict, so they avoid useful arguments out of fear that the tone will escalate into personal attacks they cannot handle.

Embrace regular, thoughtful conflict as the basis of effective negotiation—and of life.

More than a little research has shown that genuine, honest conflict between people over their goals actually helps energize the problem-solving process in a collaborative way.

With the style of negotiation taught in the book—an information-obsessed, empathic search for the best possible deal—you are trying to uncover value, period. Not to strong-arm or to humiliate.

Decades of goal-setting research is clear that people who set specific, challenging, but realistic goals end up getting better deals than those who don’t set goals or simply strive to do their best.

There are fill-in-the-blank labels that can be used in nearly every situation to extract information from your counterpart, or defuse an accusation:

It seems like _________ is valuable to you.

It seems like you don’t like _________.

It seems like you value __________.

It seems like _________ makes it easier.

It seems like you’re reluctant to _________.

Effective negotiators look past their counterparts’ stated positions (what the party demands) and delve into their underlying motivations (what is making them want what they want).

Never forget that a loss stings at least twice as much as an equivalent gain.

Why I finished this read: all of the above reasons and it was fun seeing psychology in action.

Stars rating: 5 of 5 as it covered what I was looking for and I enjoyed it that much. ( )
  DrT | Sep 24, 2023 |
A practical, easy to read negotiation book that looks at negotiation from a different angle than normal business books. It contains lots of great stories to demonstrate the key points, although I did feel at times that some of the stories were been told as a bit of an ego boost for the author and there was some repetition. It has definitely given me lots of things to consider, putting them into action is however the hard part and I have already pulled myself up on how I have approached some situations. Well worth reading. ( )
1 vota gianouts | Jul 5, 2023 |
Es mostren 1-5 de 29 (següent | mostra-les totes)
Chris Voss's Never Split the Difference is a resourceful book with several great tips. Here is a link to a video summary of its key takeaway
http://youtu.be/kOsEvSM45Ac
 

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Raz, Tahlautor secundaritotes les edicionsconfirmat
Kramer, MichaelNarradorautor secundarialgunes edicionsconfirmat
Orrao, SergioTraductorautor secundarialgunes edicionsconfirmat
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Business. Self-Improvement. Nonfiction. HTML:

A former international hostage negotiator for the FBI offers a new, field-tested approach to high-stakes negotiations??whether in the boardroom or at home.

After a stint policing the rough streets of Kansas City, Missouri, Chris Voss joined the FBI, where his career as a hostage negotiator brought him face-to-face with a range of criminals, including bank robbers and terrorists. Reaching the pinnacle of his profession, he became the FBI's lead international kidnapping negotiator. Never Split the Difference takes you inside the world of high-stakes negotiations and into Voss's head, revealing the skills that helped him and his colleagues succeed where it mattered most: saving lives. In this practical guide, he shares the nine effective principles??counterintuitive tactics and strategies??you too can use to become more persuasive in both your professional and personal life.

Life is a series of negotiations you should be prepared for: buying a car, negotiating a salary, buying a home, renegotiating rent, deliberating with your partner. Taking emotional intelligence and intuition to the next level, Never Split the Difference gives you the competitive edge in any discuss

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