This had a reeeeally slooooooow start where I got immensely frustrated because the same words were repeated over and over again and because of that I can't recommend this super highly. However, there was some strong messaging in here about listening, and about understanding.

I think the most touching aspect really was Rukhsana and her friends, and the way that worked around.

But the murder was weird and out of place and sad. I was totally on the train listening to my favourite moment of Lost in the Dream (don't ask me which I don't know track names) and being emotional and then this happened and was kind of just a huge wham? I don't think it really worked. And then it was entirely glossed over. I wish that Rukhsana's parents had come around for a different reason, because as real and as scary as that was, that's not a common experience, and if any gay Bengali teens are reading this and wanting advice, well, that's not very helpful.

And I feel like the rape aspect should have been better followed. Her poor mother. I just felt like it needed more closure.

So yeah--this wasn't as light as it seemed like it would be, and the pacing was all over, so. I'd like to read more contemporaries from this author though. ( )

I don't read enough YA to be able to judge the book fairly but I liked it I think.

"Bangladeshi-American Rukhsana Ali must choose between her family’s wishes and following her heart.

Although her Muslim immigrant parents approve of her professional dreams of becoming a physicist at NASA, Rukhsana is sure that they won’t be as enthusiastic about her personal dream of spending her life with her secret girlfriend, Ariana, who is white. After winning a prestigious scholarship to Caltech, her professional ambitions seem within reach—until her mother catches her kissing Ariana and she is whisked away to Bangladesh with plans to arrange her marriage. As she battles her parents’ homophobia, Rukhsana simultaneously struggles to help Ariana and her friends back home in Seattle understand the weight of the cultural and social stigmas that she has to fight. Along the way, Rukhsana finds unexpected allies, including her grandmother, who encourages her to fight for what she wants. This witty coming-out story is populated by colorful, nuanced personalities who never lapse into stereotypes. Unfortunately, the fast pace leaves readers little time to digest the most intense moments, including some physical and sexual violence. Likewise, the sheer amount of action leaves certain characters, like Rukhsana’s spoiled but loving brother, insufficient time to fully develop. However, the story is told tenderly and unflinchingly, balancing the horrors of homophobia against the South Asian men and women who risk their lives to fight it each and every day.

A coming-out story featuring diverse characters and a richly rendered international setting. (Fiction. 14-18)" www.kirkusreviews.com

diverse teen fiction (lesbian 17 y.o. teen deals with her homophobic Muslim Bengali family in Seattle and in Bangladesh)
I read the backmatter first (which doesn't mention the author's daughter coming "out" to her family, though that explains the care that the author put into representing the LGBTQA community) so the twist wasn't that much of a surprise. I liked the discussion about being between cultures and Rukhsana being unfairly seen as representing her entire culture (#ownvoices). ( )

This was a great book. Overall, I thought the protagonist was relatable, interesting, funny, and resilient. The book was rich with interesting people, complex mother-daughter-grandmother dynamics, support and betrayal. Ultimately, for Rukhsana, this book is about finding a path to self-liberation and finding community in those who embrace all the parts of her--her lesbianism and her Bengali culture.

Complaints: The ending tied things up a little too quickly and in a way that left me feeling like the depth of Rukhsana's experience and the harm done was not fully honored by the narrative. It was rushed in a way that didn't ring true. She deserves happiness, but in my experience it doesn't come so easily when trust has been so broken. The other main complaints are Rukhsana's relationships with Ariana (her girlfriend) and her two white friends... these three are wildly self-involved. They frequently mistreat and mischaracterize Rukhsana; they deny her the benefit of the doubt, look down on her culture, and are actively racist. I had a hard time understanding why Rukhsana felt connected to any of them, why she was in love with Ariana, or why anyone would root for Ariana and Rukhsana to be together at all. I wanted Rukhsana, in her becoming, to get to a place where she realizes Ariana (clearly) isn't right for her, and isn't good to her. ( )