Gender Queer: A Memoir (2019 original; edició 2019)

CA: snakes, brief nudity

Kobabe's graphic memoir explores their experience with and confusion about gender from early childhood through adulthood, and it is *amazing*. Just stunningly crafted, gentle, and honest. I wasn't going to read this (in a quiet sort of "I'm probably good; I can pass that one up" way), and then a chucklehead from my adopted stated decided to sue a (single) Barnes and Noble store for making the book available to children (read: carried it in the store; B&N (of course?) doesn't restrict any of it's material; literally everything in there is available to everyone), and then I had to buy and read it in support of the author, the book, and bookstores. And it was a perfect reading experience. Thank you, Streisand effect. Seriously, though. The book is so good. Recommended. ( )

This is an important graphic memoir for young people as it explores gender identity and sexuality. I am glad this book exists as it gives voice to topics that can sometimes be almost silent whispers.

Maia Kobabe (e/em/eir) writes forthrightly about a childhood, adolescence, and early adulthood in which e was confused about eir gender and sexuality, and, once e figured some of it out, had difficulty standing up for eirself (e.g. correcting people who misgendered em, even at queer comics conventions). Eir closest family and friends, however, were supportive and strove to understand, asking questions respectfully. As Maia realizes at the end of the book, it's important to talk about gender, identity, and sexuality with young people, as many of them have the same questions e did growing up. (Naturally, those who want to maintain the cis/hetero/gender binary are afraid of this book and want to ban it.)

See also: Button Pusher by Tyler Page, Song of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce

Quotes

It was everyone else being silly, not me. (22)

The clearest metaphor I had for my of gender identity in college was the image of a scale. A huge weight [AFAB] had been placed on one side, without my permission. I was constantly trying to weigh down the other side [short hair, baggy boy clothes]. But the end goal wasn't masculinity - the goal was balance. (120)

As I pondered a pronoun change, I began to think of gender less as a scale and more as a landscape.
Some people are born in the mountains, while others are born by the sea. Some people are happy to live in the place they were born, while others must make a journey to reach the climate in which they can flourish and grow.
Between the oceans and the mountains is a wild forest. That is where I want to make my home. (191)

...why am I like this??? Sometimes I feel like my sexuality is broken and my gender is broken.
I feel like there are all these wires in my brain which were supposed to connect BODY to GENDER IDENTITY and SEXUALITY
But they've all been twisted into a huge snarled mess. (198)

I wonder if any of these kids are trans or nonbinary, but don't have words for it yet? How many of them have never seen a nonbinary adult? Is my silence actually a disservice to all of them? (237) ( )

I read this book solely because I heard that it was the most banned books in American schools. It was well written and a fast read. I didn't give it a 5 basically because I am not that interested in the subject. ( )

Fascinating to see inside another's head. Hats off to Maia for sharing her story. I'm grateful for all I learned. Good story and quite the page turner. Nice illustration. ( )