Good short work on self-esteem and dealing with the unspoken assumption to rise to personal perfection to please parents and others. Using the Garden of Eden story as object lesson Kushner nicely shows how Adam an Eve helped their descendants to better cope with the fall from Grace and the expulsion from Eden. The Garden of Eden story for Kushner is an invitation for all to love as humans love, with obvious faults but still genuinely and with good intentions.

One of my favorite philosophical books. Although he certainly discusses the role of God and religion in our lives, it is largely a discussion of a healthy approach to life. This is a great book for married couples, for parents, for young people, for old people, for those who are successful and those who are struggling. In short, whatever stage of life you are in, there is some wisdom in here for you. ( )

How Good Do We Have to Be?: A New Understanding of Guilt and Forgiveness by Harold S. Kushner. Epiphany library section 8 D: Life Skills, Emotional Support. Nobody is perfect. Yet when we hold others and ourselves to be perfect, the results are disappointment, guilt, anger and depression. Using the stories of Adam and Eve and Cain and Abel, Kushner teaches us how to accept others and ourselves despite imperfections. He draws upon literature, theology, and his 30 years of counseling parishioners as a rabbi, to explain how to live well without expectations of perfection. Acceptance of people as they are, and forgiving those we feel have let us down (our parents, our children, our colleagues) helps us meet the challenge of being human.
I especially like how Kushner explains the difference between lower orders of animals, with people. How did humans rise above other animals? The Garden of Eden explains it, but Kushner says the lesson of Eden is quite different than the typical one of blaming Eve as the originator of sin. Kushner says Eve was actually the catalyst in giving humankind greater understanding than other animals of past, present, and future, and of right and wrong. I also like how he discusses hidden resentments in families between parents and children, and between siblings themselves. This gave me ideas about how to repair rifts in my own clan.
Kushner, best known for his book, When Bad Things Happen to Good People, also in our church library, is a marvelous writer whose books never cease to offer readers hope in a loving and nurturing God who needs us, loves and forgives us, despite our imperfections. Though Kushner is Jewish, his books can be read and appreciated by those of other faiths and those with no faith at all. Since he relies on lessons from the OT, Lutherans will be quite at home with all he mentions. ( )

Anyone who has children, regardless of how old those children are, and anyone who has parents, regardless of how old oneself is, and regardless of whether those parents are still living, should read this book. Yes, I realize that covers every human on earth. But even if you don't read the whole book, at least read the chapter, "Fathers, Sons, Mothers and Daughters." It is about how parents, event the best of whom are flawed, struggle to raise their children, and how children, especially adult children, struggle with the way their imperfect parents raised them. There is an element of religion from a Jewish perspective (Kushner spent many years as a congregational rabbi) but this chapter is more philosophy and psychology than anything else. Whether you are currently struggling to raise children or not… whether you have a good relationship with your parents or not… whether your parents are still living or not… do yourself a favor and read this chapter of this book.

The rest of the book is very good too, but I just feel so strongly about this one chapter I have to dwell on it. ( )

It explained how to reinterpret the Garden of Eden story. The ability to see the difference between good and evil is seen as what makes us human. Very interesting with interesting bits of insight. ( )