4 Stars

“I can’t tell if this feels good or terrible”

So here's the rub. This book is phenomenal in the writing, in the topical subject matter, in the strong feels and capturing first love in all its heady, unsure, obsessive intoxication. However, when it comes to religious intolerance and the inevitable self denial of one’s sexuality, that secret permeates everything with an insidious anxiety that may put a damper on some people’s overall enjoyment, no matter how big the love and romance is, no matter how amazing the story is.

I know it’s my old age that no longer has the patience for such, and I know that books like these need to be written, as an outlet, as a resource, as an example of hope and acceptance and validation. Even if you’re not a CLo fan, this book brings all that and more.

And….referencing the quote above, that’s kinda how I felt about this story. This has fabulous writing and apt angst portraying realistic barriers and issues regarding religious inflexibility in accepting LGBTQ members into their fold - specifically the Mormon faith. This is the main roadblock to Tanner and Sebastian, and though their coming together was so sweet, their conflict absolutely puts a damper on their burgeoning feelings, that Sebastian's faith has zero tolerance for any other interpretation on what love can be between two people if it’s not between a man and a woman.

Teen angst never hurt so good. Well…. you know what I mean. I will say that Tanner is a fabulous protagonist. He blends perfectly the innocence and earnestness of a young man who’s ready to fall wholeheartedly in love for the first time and deserves, like every teenager/young adult out there, to experience such without fear or recrimination. Despite his short 18 years, he grapples with many of the unfair issues that come up with him being attracted to Sebastian and vice versa, with a maturity that is particularly poignant and painful. This burgeoning crush has enough tentative insecurity and tender starts, that it doesn’t need the added burden where one has been taught his nontraditional feelings are wrong. Tanner shouldn’t have to deal with this. Sebastian shouldn’t have to either. Suffice it to say, this also contrasts two opposites of what a loving family does for their children. One is the epitome of total acceptance and nonjudgmental support. The other, predicated acceptance only if the doctrinated path is followed.

So yes, this is the ultimate in YA romance. Exploring and finding one’s identity in all its angsty glory, making grand gestures and grand mistakes. My heart hurt consistently throughout - this wasn’t a joy for me to read, especially with a tentative, albeit hopeful, HFN. However, CLo shows that they can move beyond fabulously smexy dirty to something heartfelt and important, and I certainly applaud that enthusiastically. ( )

Each year I look for a great YA LGBTQ novel to buy for my friend Tom for his birthday. I've done this for the last four years and he's loved all of them. So the pressure is on now to deliver. I had high hopes for Autoboyography. I think the title alone will make Tom smile. After finishing it, I'm a little hesitant because the main relationship was a bit too shallow insta-love, but overall the book definitely has the main thing I'm looking for: all of the feels.

Here are the past books I've gotten him:

Simon Vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda (so excited for the movie)
The Great American Whatever
Boy Meets Boy
If I Was Your Girl

Should I just get him another David Levithan book? (There are so many good ones to choose from.) Or go with this new one? Still debating.

On the one hand, I really liked how this book handles religion and sexuality with sensitivity. On the other, I didn't buy Tanner and Autumn's complicated friendship. It's highly unusual for a teenage girl to be so physically affectionate with a boy who is just a friend (unless he is openly gay). It is also unusual for a teenage boy to be so physically affectionate with a girl who is just his friend -- especially if he knows she *likes* him and he doesn't reciprocate. Very weird territory. I didn't get it, but maybe I'm too old to get kids these days. Still, I truly didn't like that they end up having sex after Tanner is emotionally crushed by Sebastian breaking up with him. It felt unnecessary to the plot. Autumn just wanted to lose her virginity and took advantage. Tanner just wanted to escape his feeling of rejection. It's gross that they both used each other for sex and unbelievable that they got over it so quickly. ( )

I was so afraid to read this book, I hate how people usually see Mormons as this cultist group that hates the gays and burn the women, it was refreshing seeing a book where faith and sexuality can coexist inside someone. Sebastian was everything I wanted to see, and I really liked how, even if Tanner didn't have the same faith, was always respectful and didn't make fun of his boyfriend's prayers. ( )

I’ll probably try to write an actual review of this later, but right now I’m just teary eyed with happiness and so emotional. It was just a purely good, heartwarming book and I love it so freaking much. ( )

Unpopular opinion time!
1 star.
Because it's pretty much meh from where I stand.
Maybe others will find this book exactly what they need. But for me it hit the jackpot of things I avoid in my reading, in no particular order:
- First person POV
- Religion
- Insta-love

I can deal with any one on its own IF the story and writing are good. But put together? It ought to be something TRULY SPECTACULAR. Sadly, this is not the case here.

The writing is ...interesting, I guess? It reads easy, but doesn't really ensnare. Personally, did not feel the need to pick up the book after putting it down. (Actually, that dark and creepy corner with possibility of murder? Way more exciting.)

Since I did not make it far (1/10) I cannot tell you anything about further on.
Except, I flipped to the end and now can safely say that divorce from reality seems to be a common theme for WAY too many writers.
Also - why does most everyone insist on defined endings? I could happily embrace some will-they-won't-they. Open endings are nice when done properly. (hint: nope, not here)

FINAL VERDICT : TRY IT ON FOR SIZE BUT BE WARNED ( )