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Families and How to Survive Them (1983)

de Robin Skynner, John Cleese (Autor)

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What makes a family happy? Why do some marriages 'succeed' and others 'fail'. How can we free ourselves from the legacy of past mistakes and bring about positive change? Love, sex and marriage and parenthood, depression and sadness, independence and experience are just a few of the many issues explored in coversation by family therapist Robin Skynner and his former patient and comedian, John Cleese. Guiding us through the daily issues that confront us all, FAMILIES AND HOW TO SURVIVE THEM offers vital advice in helping each of us to maintain a happy, healthy family life. Looking candidly at everything from our relationships with our parents to why and how we choose our partners, no emotional stone is left unturned- jealousy, rage, fear, envy, love, obsession, hope and despair - all are featured-with practical advice on how to turn round a negative situation and bring about change for the better.… (més)
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Excellent. Written as conversations between John Cleese (of Fawlty Towers fame) and his family therapist, Robin Skynner. This book looks at psychiatry for the layman, in terms of why some people are happy while others aren't; why some people have repressed emotions, and what happens to them; what can cause people to become 'stuck' in their development from babyhood. I don't agree with every word - the recommendations about strict discipline for children seem over-harsh to me, for instance - but much of what's said is revelatory and fascinating. I first read this about twelve years ago, and found it extremely helpful in understanding my sons better. Even now, as an empty-nester, I can see a lot of value in this for self-help, and figuring out how people tick and why some are easier to get along with than others - quite apart from their different personality preferences.

The humour is decidedly 'British', and a non-British friend once told me that she simply didn't get the cartoons, which she even found mildly offensive in places. Take it with a pinch of salt - but if you ever wanted to know why some families get along and others don't, in broad terms, I'd recommend this book highly. ( )
  SueinCyprus | Jan 26, 2016 |
My goodness, was this accepted as true thirty years ago?

Robin Skynner says that the parents are to blame for everything that goes wrong in a child, except they can't help it because of their parents. Pretty hopeless, really.

Especially to blame for sexual 'deviance'. He specifically doesn't want homosexuallity called perversion, but he is convinced that it is caused by the upbringing and could be cured if the patient really wanted that. (But too much trouble really, so we don't bother. And we won't insist on rubbing it in that it's really very abnormal, even if it is. Aren't we kind and considerate?)

He also seems to think that all interaction between mental and physical illness starts at the mental side, and that medicinal care could be replaced with psychiatric treatment. ( )
1 vota MarthaJeanne | Feb 20, 2014 |
Zeer duidelijke uitleg over hoe relaties functioneren en waarom mensen doen zoals ze doen. Met de beschrijvingen over homoseksualiteit waagt hij zich op glad ijs. ( )
  Paix52 | Dec 2, 2012 |
Spooky good. Some may question the science, and I wondered if the information is dated, but it made so much sense that I have nothing bad to say about it. ( )
  MsNikki | Jan 22, 2012 |
De verhaalstijl van het boek is pakkend, de auteur doet je dat ook verwachten. Maar de positie die het boek in neemt over bijvoorbeeld 'afwijkende' sexuele voorkeuren en keuzes maakt de inhoud een stuk discutabeler. ( )
  PiAir | May 10, 2009 |
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Nom de l'autorCàrrecTipus d'autorObra?Estat
Skynner, RobinAutorautor primaritotes les edicionsconfirmat
Cleese, JohnAutorautor principaltotes les edicionsconfirmat
Handelsman, J. B.Il·lustradorautor secundarialgunes edicionsconfirmat
Stigter, KarinTraductorautor secundarialgunes edicionsconfirmat

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Yes, the world's always changing. In fact we need a certain level of change, of stimulation. If we get too little, we feel bored and only half alive. Change is harmful only when it goes beyond the ability of our system to cope with it -- as when there's a big sudden change or too many small changes in a row that don't allow us to recover our equilibrium. (pg. 69)
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What makes a family happy? Why do some marriages 'succeed' and others 'fail'. How can we free ourselves from the legacy of past mistakes and bring about positive change? Love, sex and marriage and parenthood, depression and sadness, independence and experience are just a few of the many issues explored in coversation by family therapist Robin Skynner and his former patient and comedian, John Cleese. Guiding us through the daily issues that confront us all, FAMILIES AND HOW TO SURVIVE THEM offers vital advice in helping each of us to maintain a happy, healthy family life. Looking candidly at everything from our relationships with our parents to why and how we choose our partners, no emotional stone is left unturned- jealousy, rage, fear, envy, love, obsession, hope and despair - all are featured-with practical advice on how to turn round a negative situation and bring about change for the better.

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